Mother’s Day is a celebration for most. Yet for those who have lost their mothers, it can be a difficult day marked by grief and isolation.
“The first year after a loss can be horrible, but the holidays especially stand out,” noted Rebecca Feinglos, a certified grief support specialist in North Carolina and founder of Grieve Leave, an online community to support grieving people. .
“Your first Mothers’ Day After your mother dies, her absence can seem even more real. It’s a stark reminder of the permanence of loss.”
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For those who had a close bond with their mother, Feinglos said the absence can feel like a “gaping hole” in their daily lives.
“And for those whose relationships with their mothers were less than ideal, Mother’s Day can bring up a whole range of different emotions,” she said.
For those who have lost their mother, Mother’s Day can be a difficult day to deal with. A certified grief support specialist (not pictured) shares insights and help for coping. (iStock)
“There may be a mixture of grief for the relationship they never had, with anger or resentment over past hurts.”
“The key is to be intentional about how you want to spend the day.”
It doesn’t help that Mother’s Day is a high-profile party with such emphasis on the mother-child relationship, Feinglos said.
“Everywhere you turn there are advertisements, social media posts and conversations centered around celebrating mothers,” she said.
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“For those who have recently lost their mother, this constant barrage of Mother’s Day messages can feel like salt in the wound, regardless of the circumstances of their relationship.”
“For those who have recently lost their mother, [the] A constant barrage of Mother’s Day messages can feel like salt in the wound, no matter the circumstances of their relationship,” said one expert. (iStock)
For those approaching their first Mother’s Day after lose a motherFeinglos offered five tips for navigating difficult emotions.
1. Make a plan
“Trust me, you don’t want to wake up to your first orphan Mothers’ Day with no idea how to get through the day,” Feinglos said.
“It’s a recipe for a major heartbreak spiral and potentially scrolling through other people’s ‘Happy Mother’s Day’ messages.”
The expert recommends thinking ahead about what you’d like your day to look like and then planning it.
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“It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. Maybe it’s watching your mom’s favorite movies on Netflix, ordering her favorite meal, or hiking a trail that you were traveling together,” she said.
“The key is to be intentional about how you want to spend the day.”
“The first year after a loss can be horrible, but the holidays stand out…
